Surrender

It is funny.
I have been praying so long to be a mommy.
And now that I am 5 days late, I am so scared.
I have taken two pregnancy tests, both negative.
Part of me is praying that "Aunt Flo" will arrive soon
The other part of me is so hopeful.

I read today, to just surrender to God, the things you have no control over.
This has been my most difficult battle.
My entire life.
I worry and stress over things I can't control.
I can't control Tom's work situation.
I can't control whether or not I get pregnant.
I can't control my mom.
My dad.
I just have to let go and let God.
But it is so hard.
I am learning though.
More now than ever before.
Just to surrender to God
And to trust in Him, in my Heavenly Father
That He will take care of me
Just like my own father does.

As I develop this deep, loving relationship with my Heavenly Father
I feel myself falling in love with Him.
It is different than falling in love my husband.
It is as though I have met my daddy.
My Comforter. My Best Friend.

I am three days behind on writing about my daily reflections.
Surrender.
Taking Care of Ourselves.
Living with Families.

I will do the other two in seperate posts.
Sorry for the long posts.
I just want to tell you everything thats going on.

All my love <3